Skinny jeans: Have they gone too far?

Outside of athletic apparel for Winter Olympians, skin-tight pants for men have never been in high demand. Levi’s is trying to change this. And the result is not pretty.

The photograph of the man in pain seen here is actually live on the Levi’s website, where it’s promoting the Ex-Girlfriend Jean, a new style with a “spray on ultra-skinny fit.” It’s the latest evolution in a trend toward ever-tighter men’s pants. My friend Jon was in a Levi’s store this week and confirms this is a real product, actually on the shelves.

Let’s talk about the name first. It’s a play on women’s “boyfriend” pants, which take styling cues from men’s pants. Using “boyfriend” to describe women’s clothes was popularized a few years ago by the Gap, which resulted in a small degree of controversy. One website called the Boyfriend Trouser the “Worst Product Name of 2007.” But the name actually made sense, and other brands copied the idea.

Now Levi’s, by adding an “ex-” to the name and applying it to men, gives it a bit more edge. Ex? Hmm, there’s an intriguing story behind these pants. Levi’s catalog copy says: “Remember the girlfriend with the great style? Here’s a tribute to her — a fit that’s super-snug allover, an update of the five-pocket classic that’s as skinny as it gets.”

What Levi’s has done with the name is clever. And here ends Breaking Copy’s interest in the story—or it could anyway. But as a male writer, I think what Levi’s has done with the jeans deserves a few words.

Words like unpardonable. Appalling. Reprehensible. These nut-huggers can only be a diabolical plot to keep hipsters from breeding. Even fixie-riding vegan MGMT fans are entitled to a little breathing room in the crotch. It’s a human right.

Fortunately, the resistance has already begun. Check out this Miller Lite commercial which started airing in January—beating Levi’s product launch by a month!

Fellas, there’s a lesson here. We have a powerful force we can use against the formidable Levi’s marketing apparatus: Shame.

Friends don’t let friends wear Ex-Girlfriend Jeans. The next time you see a dude wearing or considering a purchase of pants this skinny, bring on the shame. Tell him he looks ridiculous. Tell him a man in jeans is supposed to look like Bruce Springsteen on the cover of “Born in the U.S.A.”—not David Bowie in “Labyrinth.”

This is our fight. Stop the ultra-skinny jean for the right reasons. Save your friends’ balls.